Over the past few years, I’ve cut way back on my social media consumption for a variety of reasons, but one of the big ones was that I was losing my joy in homemaking.
I know that might sound crazy, especially since you probably found this post through social media!
However, I’d like to chat with you about how I’m dealing with comparing myself to others both online and in real life to hopefully be an encouragement to you.
The Right Way to Homemaking
As women we look to others whether it’s in our real lives or online, and we think that there is some right way to do homemaking.
It can be exhausting when we compare ourselves to others.
I experienced this a few years ago. I thought that I needed to be baking with sourdough. It was and still is all over the internet.
It seemed like if any woman wanted to be a real homemaker, she had to have a jar of sourdough starter on her kitchen counter and make beautiful, artisan breads every day.
So I decided I needed to do that.
But I could not stand the smell of sourdough in my kitchen, nor did my family like the taste of anything that I made.
Plus it was a bit tedious – feeding the sourdough every day and also discarding some of it.
It was just all around a bit overwhelming and not fun.
I do however like to bake with yeast – breads, rolls, and pizza dough. I decided I like baking with yeast much more than sourdough.
So after a couple of weeks trying to be a “better homemaker” by making sourdough, I decided it wasn’t for me.
Now, I’m not bashing sourdough. I personally like the taste even though my family doesn’t like it. And if you love baking with sourdough, that’s great! I’m glad it works for you.
Homemaking Looks Different
But the lesson I learned in that is homemaking is not a one size fits all thing.
Yes, there are certain basics that we all must accomplish – laundry, dishes, meals, cleaning, organization, finances. But the way in which we do those things can look different.
In fact, they probably should look different.
We are all uniquely created by a God who loves us and wants us to find our fulfillment in Him. Not in comparing ourselves to what we see online or to a friend or family member.
Honestly, trying sourdough was a good thing to do. It stretched me and helped me learn what I like and what I don’t like.
The problem wasn’t trying new things. In fact, I tried yeast years ago and didn’t have success at first, but now I love baking with it!
The real problem was my heart and mindset. I thought that in order to be a good homemaker I had to be baking with sourdough like every other homemaker on the internet. (slight exaggeration)
And when it didn’t work out, I felt discouraged and that I wasn’t measuring up.
It took me a moment of honest reflection to realize I was comparing myself to other people and thinking I had to live up to their lives.
What Does God Want You To Do?
But God simply asks us to do the things He has called us to do.
That’s when I started cutting back even more on my social media consumption. If I was watching a YouTube channel that left me feeling like I wasn’t doing enough or that I was doing homemaking in a wrong way, I either cut back watching it or unsubscribed.
Nothing personal to that creator. There are plenty of other channels that I watch who do things differently than me, but I feel inspired by them to do what I can where I am with what I have.
I hope to be that to you here on my blog. And I hope that today has been just a simple reminder to not compare yourself to others.
One of the quotes my mom used to say was, “Bloom where you are planted.”
Where has God planted you today? Don’t compare your soil and sunshine to someone else’s. Your life circumstances, your abilities, your training are specific to you.
Please don’t fall into the trap of thinking that you have to look like someone else or be doing x, y, and z to be successful.
If you are on the fence about adding something into your life (maybe even sourdough), I encourage you to ask God what He would have you do.
Proverbs 3: 5-6 says, “Lean not on your own understanding but in all your ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your paths.”
When you feel like you’re not doing enough, ask God to help you discern if that is truly the case or if you’re just comparing yourself to someone else.
He will give you the wisdom to know.