As a mom you have a pretty thankless job, right? It can feel like you are the only one cleaning up after everyone else.
It’s almost like your husband and children have special vision that only allows them to see clean spaces and no messes!
Early in my marriage, I used to clean up after my husband all the time and I started to grow resentful. Then when my son came along, it was like double the mess.
I knew I had to make some changes, cuz this Momma wasn’t going to keep cleaning up after everyone all the time. If you feel the same way, I’ve got some great tips for you.
Here’s what I did and you can do too!
Tired of Cleaning Up After Everyone
1. Stop cleaning up what others can do for themselves.
One day it occurred to me that I was doing things for my kids that they could do for themselves. Ever since then, I take a mental note of things they should be doing.
I know how easy it is to just pick the toys up yourself or clear the dishes from the table. You could do it 100 times faster and you don’t have to listen to complaining!
But every time you do things for your children that they could do for themselves, you are sending them the message that they don’t have to clean up for themselves.
Instead of doing it yourself, let your kids know what you expect of them. Even toddlers can be responsible for cleaning up their toys.
It takes lots of work and repetition, but in the long run it is worth the time and energy it takes to train your children how to clean up after themselves.
Related Post: How to Get Toddlers to do Chores
2. Speak up. Your family can’t read your mind.
Wouldn’t life be easier if your children and husband could just read your mind?! I mean, “Pick up the toys. Put the laundry away. Sweep up the mess you made.”
The reality is they don’t know what you are thinking, and sometimes you have to be super straightforward and ask your spouse to help or tell your kids to help.
It amazes me what messes my family will literally ignore while it drives me crazy! The truth is they don’t see things they way I do. What looks like a chaotic mess to me, doesn’t look like one to them.
If I want it clean I either have to clean it myself or speak up and ask someone else to do it. I’m a big fan of people taking care of their own messes.
If a child spills a drink, that child gets a towel and dries it up.
If another child gets cracker crumbs all over the couch, that child vacuums the crumbs up.
It takes time and lots of repetition, but eventually your family will learn that you expect them to clean up after themselves.
Sometimes my kids will do great for a couple of days, and then stop picking up. That is when I remind them to pick up their messes.
The next time you see a mess that needs to be cleaned up, don’t just clean it up yourself, speak up and get the others in your home to help.
THINGS YOUR KIDS SHOULD BE DOING:
- taking dirty dishes to the sink
- putting away toys
- putting laundry in the hamper
- putting shoes away
- cleaning up spills
See this post for more: Age Appropriate Chores for Kids
4. Remember why you are cleaning up after everyone.
Whenever I start to feel irritated with the messes around my home, I have to remember the reason behind the messes.
Every dirty dish, sock on the floor, lego stepped on, muddy shoe print mopped – they represent people. Precious people you would give your life for.
Change your perspective and see past the messes to what they represent. Melissa Michaels calls them beautiful messes in her book Love the Home You Have (affiliate link).
If you feel yourself getting upset as you clean up, take a moment to breathe and think about the reason why you have a mess in the first place.
Then ask whoever is able to help clean up the mess and finally, don’t clean it up if it isn’t necessary.
The reason for dirty dishes – you were able to feed your family!
The reason for laundry – you are able to clothe your family!
The reason for toys – your kids are playing and learning!
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4 thoughts on “Tired of cleaning up after everyone: 4Tips!”
Thanks Emily for the great reminder.
My pleasure! <3
Why does people think that women (wife) always the one who clean the house.. I am a husband, i have my wife, two female children and my wife’s niece and her baby living in one house and I am perosn who is always cleaning and looking after the house, whilst doing my full-time job.
That must be difficult, David. I’m simply writing from my perspective as a woman (wife) (mom). I hope you can still use the general advice given in this article as it can be applied to all. The best thing you could do is communicate kindly with your wife about sharing the responsibilities.