When I was 34 years old, I made a change in my life that gave me so much freedom.
It affected my relationships, my outlook on life… and even the way I approach homemaking. And today, I want to share what that change was—specifically how it transformed my home.
For the first 34 years of my life, I didn’t really pay attention to my thoughts. Not in a meaningful, intentional way.
But during a challenging season, I began noticing the words constantly swirling in my head—the quiet, ongoing conversations I was having with myself throughout the day.
And during that time, I realized something life-changing:
I am not in control of everything.
But I am in control of my thoughts… and my attitude.
Up until that point, I had placed so much emphasis on what I did—being productive, doing things well, getting it “right.” But I had largely ignored the way I was thinking.
I would replay past failures.
I would dwell on things people said to me—or about me.
And I would let those words take root and shape how I saw myself.
When I first got married nearly 18 years ago, I didn’t really know how to cook. A lot of meals were not great.
And when I brought food to gatherings, sometimes people would make comments. Maybe they didn’t mean anything by it, but I took it to heart.
Over time, I labeled myself: I’m a bad cook.
And I carried that belief with me for years.
But looking back, I can see something I didn’t understand then: It wasn’t just the meals that were the problem. It was the way I was thinking about myself.
I was speaking to myself in a way that was hurtful rather than helpful. I was letting those thoughts run unchecked in my mind.
But when I started paying attention to my thoughts, everything began to change.
Not overnight, but slowly and intentionally. I became more aware of what I was telling myself.
I stopped agreeing with every negative thought that came into my mind, and I started asking: Is this actually true?
This verse became an anchor for me during that time:
“Take every thought captive to obey Christ.”
—2 Corinthians 10:5
That truth became very real in my everyday life. Because not every thought that enters my mind deserves to stay there.
So I began taking those thoughts captive instead of letting them run wild.
I started replacing them.
Instead of thinking, “I’m a bad cook,”
I began telling myself, “I’m learning. I can grow—one meal at a time.”
Instead of replaying something embarrassing,
I would redirect my thoughts to what is true and good.
Philippians 4:8 says:
“Whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable… think about these things.”
This shift didn’t just change how I felt internally—it changed how I showed up in my home.
I stopped focusing so much on myself—my failures, my shortcomings—and began meditating on Christ and thinking beyond myself.
Homemaking stopped feeling like a constant reminder of what I wasn’t good at, and started becoming a place where I could grow, learn, and serve with joy.
Even something as simple as decluttering a cupboard felt different.
Instead of thinking, “Why do I always let it get this bad?”
I began thinking, “I’m thankful I can take care of this today.”
It’s a completely different experience.
And that same shift has shown up in my kitchen, too.
I didn’t become confident in the kitchen overnight. I just kept showing up, learning, and trying again.
The difference now isn’t perfection—it’s perspective.
As I go about my daily homemaking tasks, I try to stay aware of my thoughts.
Because the words I say to myself matter. And the same is true for you.
So if you’re feeling discourage or like you’re just not measuring up, I want to encourage you to pay attention to your thoughts.
Take them captive.
Replace them with truth.
Because those thoughts can either keep you stuck or help move you forward.